Looking for some letters to lead us up to our 10th anniversary. Also seeking updates to [email protected] Put "update" in the subject line. Hi Mere, I am 24 and I've been dating this guy for about a month. He's 30 and was married for years. He's been divorced a little over a year and had a toxic on-again off-again relationship with another woman for the past year. He has told me repeatedly that he wants to take it slow and that he feels like he needs this time in his life to be single. After what he's been through, I get it. I, on the other hand, have been single for a year and finally seem to have found someone I like and connect with as much as my ex. I don't want to pressure him into anything and I accept that he wants to take it slow. It's confusing because he has brought me around to meet his friends several times and even tells me he wants to plan vacations together, etc. But other times he jokingly tells me not to kiss him or hold his hand in public because it's … [Read more...] about He doesn’t want to be serious
Have a lunch break today? I'll be at the newly reopened Trident Books & Cafe on Newbury Street signing stock at 1 p.m. Feel free to say hello, find some gifts, etc. Come tell me the name of your favorite commenter. I met my boyfriend more than two years ago. We could only see each other a couple of days a month because of the distance (we lived in different countries while I was still in college). However, this year I graduated and we moved in together just like we planned. We love each other very much – there's no doubt about that. Long-distance wasn't easy, but we made it. Now that we're together, I want to move to the next stage. I want to get married and have kids. I am ready and I know he's the one because I've never thought about these things with anyone else. I was almost against marriage before I met him. Now everything has changed and I can't see it otherwise. The problem is that he's been married before – twice, actually. I had a hard time dealing with that, … [Read more...] about I want to take the next steps … now
Time for more updates. Former letter writers, tell us what happened after you wrote in. Were we helpful? Did it all work out? Send your update to [email protected] with "Update" in the subject line. Include the email address you used to send the letter so I know it's you. January is our 10th anniversary, so I'd love to get some updates from letter writers from years ago. Also, new letters, please. Oh – on Tuesday (Dec. 11) at 1 p.m., I plan to be at Trident on Newbury Street to sign copies of "Can't Help Myself" for anyone who needs it for holidays. Come on your lunch break and say hello. If you can't make it but need a personalized book as a gift, send me an email and we'll figure it out with the store. I'm a 26-year-old woman and have never been in a relationship. I mostly hang out with friends. I have known a man for more than a decade. We met online and he had a girlfriend. A couple of years later, they broke up. Years passed, and I decided to take the step of … [Read more...] about He told me he hoped to marry me
Have an excellent holiday tomorrow. We'll do a an update or two on Friday. If you're a former letter writer who has an update, email it to [email protected] with "update" in the subject line. I met a wonderful, hardworking, smart, great man about three months ago. Things are going well, and we have said those three words to each other and see each other as often as possible. He works very long hours and has children who are in college out of town. I have teens who still live with me. Here is my issue: He says he loves me, but 90 percent of everything we do I have to initiate, plan, pay for, and organize. Sometimes he offers to help, but I am very independent and always say no. Mostly because I am hoping he will stop offering and just actually initiate something on his own. He makes significantly more money than I do but that is not the issue at all. I struggle working full time raising two kids with an angry ex. However, I am happy where I am and I am not looking for … [Read more...] about I’m the one who plans and pays
Former letter writers: Give us an update. Was our advice helpful? Where are you now? Email your update to [email protected] with "update" in the subject line. Use (or include) your original email address so I know it's you. Also, send some good letters. Dear Meredith, In short, I tend to overcomplicate things. I don't have a problem meeting people and going on dates. I think dating is fun. But I've been taking a break from it for a few months after a run of budding relationships went south. Within that time, I began seeking therapy for depression. My therapist thinks I choose people who are somehow slightly unavailable as a self-preservation method so they can't get too close. I think I developed this pattern after I found out an ex was cheating on me two years ago. I have had some great breakthroughs with this therapist's help. Back in March, I met a great guy, "Jake." Jake is very sweet, family-oriented, attractive, smart, respectful, funny, and makes a lot of effort. At … [Read more...] about Can I be in therapy and date at the same time?