Husband who transitioned to become a woman says it’s made her marriage ‘stronger than ever’ despite fearing it would end the relationship

A husband who transformed himself into a woman says it has strengthened their marriage – despite fears it would end their relationship.

Eva Echo, 39, formerly known as Si Ng, who lives in Birmingham, suffered years of self harm, an eating disorder, alcohol and pain killer abuse as well as multiple suicide attempts, before admitting to herself she was transgender.

She said she felt as though a ‘dark cloud’ was lifted after telling her wife Pippa, 29, two years ago and beginning her transition.  

Despite being terrified Pippa would leave her, she now believes her transition has improved their relationship, saying: ‘My marriage with Pippa is now stronger than ever as I am finally me.’ 

Eva and Pippa tied the knot in November 2013, eight months after meeting, and they have been inseparable ever since.

But Eva was in denial and ‘scared’ to accept who she truly was which led to years of mental torment.

The studio manager was prompted to ‘come out’ after a customer attempted to take a photo of her ‘androgynous look’ as a male.

She has since spent approximately £15,000 transitioning from male to female – Botox to contour her jawline, brow bone contour and shave, along with fat transferred from her stomach to cheeks. 

She is yet to have gender affirming surgery. 

Eva said: ‘I had always stood out as a male because I wore makeup and had long hair, but I couldn’t even say the word ‘transgender’ – never mind admit it to myself.

‘This led to self harm, alcohol and pain killer abuse, multiple suicide attempts and an eating disorder but the turning point for me was when a customer in the tattoo studio I work at tried to take a sneaky photo.

‘He obviously found something funny about my appearance and wanted to show his friends.’

She went on: ’I began to question my identity properly and it also made me think what is it about me that people stare at? What is it that I’m seeing differently when I look in the mirror?’

‘Then it hit me – I’ve always felt like a square peg in a round hole because I’ve never felt 100 per cent male.

‘I thought it is time to figure out once and for all and accept that I was a female trapped in a male’s body.’

She explained: ’I was scared to tell Pippa, who is a tattoo artist, because her world would be turned upside down too. 

‘There was a 50/50 risk with telling people – 50 per cent was how would I accept myself and the other half was how will other people accept me too. 

‘There were elements of shame, embarrassment and letting people down but telling my partner was the scariest part because we are so close.’ 

Eva was ‘surprised’ by her wife’s reaction who was unfazed and simply stated she already had a ‘feeling’.

She adds: ‘I was so scared to tell Pippa because I didn’t want her to lose so much all because of me.

‘When I went to tell her about it, I was a complete mess. I just said, “I think something is wrong with me” and she wasn’t even shocked.

‘She pretty much knew and she reassured me our relationship will stay the same.

‘It felt like a huge weight had been lifted off my shoulders and the dark cloud disappeared – the world became a sunnier place.’

Since coming out in 2017, she has been on the waiting list for her chosen NHS gender clinic.

Typical waiting times for an initial appointment is around three years, which creates ‘a lot of frustration’ for those with gender dysphoria.

Eva opted to go private to obtain her diagnosis and for facial surgery.

For her facial surgery, she went to London Transgender Clinic, with the surgery performed by renowned cosmetic and specialist transgender surgeon Mr Chris Inglefield, who was featured on ITV’s ‘Transformation Street’ documentary.

She added: ‘I took a huge step into the unknown by coming out and asking to be referred to a NHS gender clinic is one thing but to then find out that the waiting list times are ridiculous and constantly increasing. 

‘The long wait causes a lot of depression and frustration. Treatment doesn’t generally begin until around two years after the initial appointment.

‘The process starts with a formal diagnosis which then opens the door to hormone therapy (HRT) and ultimately gender affirming surgery.

‘Not everyone feels the need to have all the surgeries or treatment – some are happy enough to just stick with HRT.

‘I took the decision to go private in order to speed things up. Additionally, NHS gender clinics don’t cover anything deemed as ‘aesthetic’ so facial surgery and breast augmentation isn’t possible anyway.’

She revealed: ‘I was so nervous about revealing the real me to the rest of the world, but I did it by ‘rebranding’ and creating new social media accounts.

‘People were congratulating me and my marriage with Pippa is now stronger than ever as I am finally me.

‘We are still very much in love and have banter all the time – we sometimes even share outfit tips. 

‘I’m now feeling peace for the first time in my life and I’m doing all I can to help others, and to raise awareness for the community.’ 

Pippa said: ‘I felt relieved when Eva told me, it meant we could work together to find a solution. Before she told me, I knew something was wrong. I thought she was going to leave me.

‘Ever since we first met, we have done everything together and have never spent a night apart. 

‘It has made our marriage stronger as there aren’t any more secrets and Eva can finally be herself.

‘It’s strengthened our bond and helped us to see a much clearer future.’